Coming Full Circle
The Pentax film camera my Mom used to document my childhood.
My mom grew up in an impoverished post-war South Korea where taking and having photos was less accessible and a luxury compared to today. She always lamented that she had almost no photos of her life growing up. When she first came to America, she worked several minimum wage-jobs and was finally able to save enough to buy herself a Pentax film camera when I was born. Due to this, I always grew up with my mom taking photos of every single seemingly mundane to special event in documenting our lives. She painstakingly created an album for each year of my life until I reached high school.
When I was 7 years old, my Mom surprised me with a Nikon point-and-shoot film camera for memorizing the multiplication table. It was a simple and inexpensive camera but it became my favorite possession. One of my favorite memories from childhood was going to Costco with my mom and feeling the excitement of picking up the developed film rolls. At this time, digital photos were not yet readily available so people and businesses who needed to purchase photos would browse through catalogs and purchase stock photos through companies. I remember spending countless hours pouring over these catalogs my Dad would bring home from work and cutting out all the images I liked to make collages in a sort of retro-Pinterest fashion. Looking back now I can see how all of this had a big influence on my own enthusiasm and growing passion for photography over the years.
My love for photography continued to grow as we started shifting to the digital age, from stalking FLICKR accounts in high school and then eventually getting my own entry-level DSLR camera when I started college. I remember having so much fun in college doing impromptu photoshoots with friends and connecting with people over it too (shoutout to all my college friends who let me take their photos, you know who you are). However, once I started working and as the cameras on cell-phones started to get better in quality with each new release, I had less time for hobbies and I started to use my phone instead of my camera to document life and my travels.
Photo taken on my Mom’s Pentax of Me and my first camera- August 1997
My mom often wrote notes on the back of photos to remember the date and what each image was capturing- this was what she wrote on the photo of me above this one.
With the busyness of adult life and working a full-time job the DSLR camera started gathering dust in the back of my closet for close to 8 years. That was until about 2 years ago when I started to serve on My Church’s photography team. It allowed me to naturally experience the joy of capturing stories of people and connecting with them once again. It was also the first time in so many years that I was using an actual camera and not my phone again. This led me to start dreaming again about the idea of pursuing photography as a career. However, with the dream also came a lot of doubt and so it would be a few more years until I actually started my own business.
I felt like I had so much to learn and a million other reasons why I felt like I couldn’t start my own business. It’s really true when they say the hardest part of starting something new- is just starting. It’s so easy to play up all the odds stacked up against you in your mind and end up not doing anything at all due to that fear, perceived risk, or uncertainty. So while the dream was there I kept it tucked away somewhere in the back of my mind where it wasn’t as intimidating “for another time”. Then Covid happened. With the world being shut down and me losing my hours at work, it allowed me to take the time and space to reflect and dream again in a way that I hadn’t been able to in so long. The time had finally come. So with encouragement from several friends and my biggest supporter, my Husband, here I am now.
Film photo that I took of my beautiful Mother when I was in junior high during our annual summer trip to South Korea.
I recently went to my parent’s house and started looking through those stacks of albums again, each meticulously numbered by the corresponding year of my life. Looking through the photos and albums gave me a deeper appreciation for my Mom- each photo, each album reflecting what was precious to her and her own heart. That in each moment for her (the photographer) it was a cherishing of Me, Us, and Our family and that all these photos are now stories making up my younger years that have influenced who I am now. And that’s what in some part photography means to me even now: the treasuring of each moment, that become seasons, that become years, that become part of the stories that ultimately make up our lives.
Over thirty years have gone by since my mom bought her film Pentax camera. Coming full circle, I am now capturing your stories with my own Pentax film camera. I am so grateful for the opportunity to do what I love. I can’t wait to connect with you, learn about your uniquely beautiful stories, and create heirlooms that will last you for a lifetime.